Parliamentary update: more votes, more resignations - more holidays?

Like the last few weeks before school holidays, normally things begin to wind down toward the end of the Parliamentary term.

Not this time though. Things are ramping up to unprecedented levels of chaos and tempers are running as high as the sweltering summer heat.

So what’s happened over the last week and what does today hold?

Resignations

For a recap, last week, the following MPs resigned their government posts:

*Start Top of the Pops countdown music*

1. David Davis, former Brexit Secretary
2. Steve Baker, former Brexit Minister
3. Boris Johnson, former Foreign Secretary
4. Chris Green, former Principal Private Secretary to the Department for Transport
5. Conor Burns, former Principal Private Secretary to Boris Johnson (to be fair, his job disappeared before he did)
6. Maria Caulfield, former Vice Chair of the Conservative Party
7. Ben Bradley, former Vice Chair of the Conservative Party (and the MP who had to publicly apologise to Jeremy Corbyn for defamatory comments and pay an undisclosed amount to charity)

Since Monday, three more have slipped from government grasp into Brexit oblivion:

8. Robert Courts, former Principal Private Secretary to the Foreign Office
9. Scott Mann, former Principal Private Secretary to the Treasury
10. Guto Bebb, former Minister for Defence Department (and winner of the Parliamentary contest for the most unusual name)

So, ten are gone and, if we’re being honest, more will probably jump the mothership—or should I say, Maythership—at some point in the not-too-distant future.

Votes

On Monday night, an amendment to the Trade Bill was tabled and rejected by a margin of three votes. This amendment would have seen the UK have to stay in the customs union, had no agreement been reached by 21^st January 2019.

Unbelievably, the Lib Dem leader and former leader, Vince Cable and Tim Farron, were not present to vote against the government. Had they been, they would have brought the vote count to an even tie (a majority of three was announced in the commons, but the official count has it at 2). In such a circumstance, the Speaker of the House is allowed to cast the deciding vote. Traditionally, the speaker votes against the government, and therefore the government would have lost the vote. Instead, the government got by with a majority of 2 and can disregard any calls to stay in the customs union going forward.

On Tuesday evening, the government lost a vote on an agreement which would see the UK maintain links with the European Medicines Agency. This is only the second Brexit defeat the government has suffered. While Brexiteers were angry, it’s hard to see how having free access to the world’s largest market for medication is a bad thing.

Tuesday evening also saw the government retract a proposal for an early holiday. Following a furious berating from Churchill’s grandson, Nicolas Soames MP, the government was asked by the speaker if they would still be tabling the motion. In a manner similar to that which I adopted after smashing my mother’s good china teapot, they appeared to know nothing about it.

What does today hold?

It’s another unbelievably tough rap for Theresa May today. Not because there are any key votes, but because she has to continue to interact with other humans. And nearly all these other humans have axes to grind.

First, she’ll present herself to the House of Commons at midday for PMQs, where she will face the usual barrage of accusations of inadequacy and failure.

This afternoon, the former foreign secretary and Britain's least favourite person, Boris Johnson, gives a statement on why he resigned. You can bet there will be a few not-so-subtle jibes at the Prime Minister in this.

Later, she goes to talk with the 1922 Committee—an organisation within the Conservative Party which has the power to oust the Prime Minister should they be dissatisfied with her performance.

To add insult to injury, following this meeting, there is a reception to which journalists are invited, meaning she’ll have to trundle out the same lines on Brexit a million times over to literally hundreds of people who are trying to catch her out.

If I were her, I’d pull a sickie.

So, that's that. Keep your eyes peeled for more departing ministers, unrestrained insults and general parliamentary dishevelment. We'll be here to update you with any developments.